We’re somewhere between the second and third false spring in the Pacific Northwest. I’m not exactly sure what comes next, but I do know that I’m ready for outdoor eating to commence.

I’m bored of my dining room (which many evenings translates into my couch) and am counting the days for the first cookout of the year. There’s only one warning that accompanies that: If you invite me over, there’s a high likelihood that I’ll accidentally break one of your outdoor chairs.

It’s an uncanny and unwanted talent, which essentially means it’s a curse. I sit normally in an outdoor chair and 20 minutes later, it breaks. I’ve splintered wooden chair legs, split fabric, and had an Adirondack arm fall off. This is why I prefer standing.

Standing is beneficial for two reasons; it eliminates the likelihood of expensive furniture damage and allows me to make a quick and unannounced exit.

I’ll bring a salad to your spring outdoor eating event, I’ll stay standing, and I’ll exit quietly.

Essentially, I’m the perfect cookout guest. Just don’t let me sit down.

Tzatziki chickpea salad

Slightly adapted from Hetty Lui McKinnon

Ingredients

• 1 cup Greek yogurt

• One large garlic clove, grated

• 2 tablespoons olive oil, plus more for serving

• 1 teaspoon honey

• 1 1/2 lemons, halved (or more, if desired, for seasoning)

• Kosher salt and freshly cracked black pepper

• 1 pound Persian (or English) cucumbers, halved lengthwise and cut into 1/2-inch pieces

• Two 15-ounce cans of chickpeas, drained

• Big handful dill, chopped

• Big handful mint leaves, chopped

• Two scallions, thinly sliced

Preparation

In a large bowl, add the yogurt, garlic, olive oil, honey and the juice of one lemon and whisk to combine. If it seems too thick, loosen it with more lemon juice. Season well with salt and pepper.

To the yogurt, add the cucumbers, chickpeas, dill, mint and scallions, and squeeze the

remaining half lemon over the mixture. Toss to coat. Taste and season well with salt and pepper. To serve, drizzle with additional olive oil.